Love of Fear
by Jonathansgirl18
Summary: We all know that Jonathan Crane has a love of fear, but when the newest temporary patient at Arkham checks in, can he hurt her, or will his new feelings for the patient get in the way? All he knows is that someone is going to get a vist from the Scarecrow
1. Twinkle, twinkle little knife

Okay, this is not only my first Cranefic, but also my first fanfic, so go easy on me. Constructive criticism is wanted but no flamers because I just laugh. So I hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Batman characters whatsoever. I also don't own the twisted lullaby you will find in the 7th paragraph. That was made by a friend of mine, If you wish to comment on her lullaby, include it in the review and I will get it to her as soon as possible, thank you.

It was dark and rainy the night Jonathan got the call that would change his life for ever.

He was sitting down to enjoy his small dinner of unseasoned chicken, green beans from the can, and water when his cell phone rang.

"Crane," he said into the receiver.

"Jonathan? This is Janis from the front office." She paused like she was waiting for a happy greeting from Jonathan, but she was still new; she didn't know yet that Jonathan Crane didn't do happy. "Well, there are people here that say their daughter has gone insane and she needs professional help. They won't leave until Dr. Smith has seen her."

"Then why are you calling me?" Crane asked with utter distain.

"Well, Dr. Smith is busy with his family right now and he says that you can handle it. He said just evaluate her and stall for time until he can get there."

"Fine. Tell them I will be there soon," he said abruptly, and without saying goodbye, he hung up. He looked at the food and sighed. _It's already cold; it will be fine when I get home. Maybe I will even be adventurous and go out to eat for a change._ And with that thought, he was out the door, keys in hand.

Somewhere in Gotham "JUST LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!" She slammed her bedroom door shut, locking herself inside.

She had to live through almost 18 years of mental torture from Mallory, Bob, and Joe. She wasn't going to take anymore. They blew all the money they had on gambling and the cheap alcohol they got drunk with every night.

Lena was still shaking from the night's events; she had promised herself she wouldn't let this happen again, she had promised herself that he wouldn't do this to her. But somehow, it happened again. She tried to tell herself that it was completely out of her control, that she couldn't do anything to stop Joe, but she never believed herself.

She went to her dresser and took out the box she hadn't seen in over three years. She opened the box with shaking hands and saw it. The knife that had almost been the death of her once before. She grasped it in her hand and with a set jaw, ran from her room into the bathroom and locking the door.

"Twinkle, twinkle little knife," she sang to herself as she sat on the cold linoleum bathroom floor, the fluorescent lights mocking her. "How I wonder what is life. As I bring it to my wrist, I know I will not be missed." She had tears streaming down her face now. "Twinkle, twinkle little knife. Now is time to leave this life." And then she heard a voice in her head. It was a familiar one that only came in times of need.

"Put the knife down, Lena," said the voice.

"Mom?" she asked.

"Yes honey, put the knife down. You may not think you have anything going for you, but trust me. You have no idea what is in store for you." Then the voice was gone.

There had only been one other time the voice had come. When she was 11 years old and she had the same knife out, and sang the same song. Her mother had visited her and told her to stop, that she was going to be missed by many people and fate had a lot in store for her, and then it vanished. She had waited 7 years and nothing good had come yet. Tonight she had had enough, and she didn't care anymore. She was going to slit her wrists, but her mother had stopped her again with the same comforting words from before

Lena still had the knife clenched in her hand. She was just about to put it down when Mallory rammed in the door, and of course this _had _to be the one night she wasn't so drunk she couldn't see an inch in front of her face.

"Oh my God." She stared at the knife that Lena was seconds away from putting down. "BOB! SHE TRIED TO COMMIT SUICIDE IN THE BATHROOM! CALL THE ASYLUM!"

"Shit, it's not what you think!" Lena tried to explain, but she knew if she struggled and told the truth that they really would lock her up. She didn't put up any resistance when the men in white came to put the straight jacket on her and didn't speak on the ride to Arkham.

When Jonathan got to the asylum, he saw one of his fellow interns coming out of the room where the family was.

"She seems fine to me. She is calm and collected, didn't raise her voice once, but," she gestured at Jonathan. "You're the expert, or so Doctor Smith says." Jonathan nodded and she walked away. He looked at the notes she shoved in his hands before leaving. All it said was the girl's name was Lena Bell. _What? _he thought._ That is all she found out? _He sighed. _I guess I'll have to do this the hard way._ And he walked in.

The sight was one of the oddest he had ever seen. He had expected to see an insane looking person sitting across the table from him, but all he saw was a very pretty girl looking bored and uncomfortable in the straight jacket. He also expected to see a grieving family, but all he saw was a woman who was throwing a very fake hysterical fit, a man who looked like he didn't really want to be here, and an older boy looking at the girl with intense eyes.

"Hello," he said, mostly to the girl in the jacket. "I'm Jonathan Crane, I will be filling in for Dr. Smith. What is the problem, exactly Mrs…?"

"Flowers. I walk into the bathroom," she paused for a few more very unbelievable sobs, "And I see her with a knife in her hand pointed to her wrist!" Finished with her story, the woman continued sobbing.

The part about the knife concerned Jonathan. He took his time to write something on his notepad and turned back to the woman. "Mrs. Flowers thank you for bringing me up to speed. If you will kindly wait outside I will asses this situation." He opened the door. They walked out and he locked it behind them.

He walked over to the girl and undid the straight jacket. "What? Aren't you afraid that I might jump out and attack you with the knife I am hiding behind my back?" she asked in a sarcastic tone.

"What really happened?" he asked as he sat down in the chair next to her.

"Well, in case you didn't notice, they aren't my real family."

"I got that much." She looked nothing like them. They all had fake orange tans, and all were extremely ugly. This girl was pale like Jonathan, but in a good way. She was the most beautiful person he had ever seen. She was the sort of girl people write books about. Long blonde hair, (it was dyed black, but he could see her roots) and beautiful green eyes.

"Well, the knife thing was true. I was considering suicide." Should she tell him about her mother? _No,_ she thought. _Then he will lock me up for sure. _"Then that idiot bangs in the locked bathroom door to see what I was doing. It was just about to put the knife down."

"Why were you even considering it?" he asked.

"Well, like I said, they aren't my real family. They are my adoptive parents. I had had enough of their bullshit."

"Enough to kill yourself?"

"You are a freaking shrink! What the hell do you know about my life and what goes on in the house I live in?" she yelled.

"Do they beat you?" he asked.

"No, not physically any way. They don't love me. They never have. When I was four my parents died, they left an enormous amount of money in my name. But I can't touch it until I am 18. So Bob and Mallory's plan is to keep me until I am that old and then throw me out and keep the money." She was trying her hardest not to cry, because this had always been a sensitive subject for her. Bob and Mallory had never laid a hand on her, but they had diminished her self-worth to all most nothing. They told her she wasn't good enough, or she was stupid or lazy, she was a bitch and worth no more then the crack whores in the Narrows. They had never laid a hand on her, though. But the son, Joe, he was a different story. He joined his parents in kicking Lena where it hurt, but he had done so much more. She tried not to think of it, but it came back to her every time she thought of him. And she remembered what he had said the night seven years ago and tonight.

Joe put his hands to Lena's throat and pushed her against the wall behind them: "If you tell any one, I will kill you and the person you told." She knew that he would do it to. He was the one who was not right in the head, and he was the one who had driven her to suicide last time.

She shook her head to get rid of the image and looked at the doctor. She hadn't really appreciated how beautiful he was when he walked in the room, she was too fed up with Mallory. Lena remembered shaking her head and giving a hollow laugh when she heard Mallory.

They were waiting in the room for the doctor. She had said to her asshole of a husband and sadist of a son, "Okay, now we need to act like we are really devastated about this whole thing," she paused to put half a bottle of the wrong kind of Visine in her eyes so they would look red and puffy and make her too dark mascara run down her cheeks like she had been crying. "So if they think that she has really gone insane, then we might be able to put her away for good" But their were two problems with that plan: one, the last time Mallory cried was when she was three and she had broken her arm; and two, she was the worst actor in the world. And the same went for Bob and Joe. Lena knew that someone with half a brain could tell that this was all a set up, and Lena wasn't the insane one.

This doctor seemed to have more then half a brain and looks to go with it. Other people might consider him geeky or weird. She thought he was amazing. The pale skin, the jet black hair, and those blue eyes. They were like a never ending vortex of beauty, misunderstanding, hurt, and vengeance.

"How old are you now?" Jonathan asked.

"18 in three months. If they can prove that I am criminally insane, then they get my money or something like that."

"Yes, if your guardians can prove you insane, criminally or not, they claim the money depending on your parents' will. What does it say, or have you not read it?"

"It says that I own everything my parents had, but legally it's not mine until I am 18. And it also says that if I go insane, then everything goes to my guardians for my treatment. But if those brainless idiots get a hold of it," she cocked her head to point to the two way mirror that Mallory and her family was waiting outside of. "I won't be getting treatment; they will just let me rot in that padded cell. They will probably blow it all on alcohol and gambling."

"Well, do you want me to call child services?" he asked.

"No, it's fine. I'll be fine, I've lived through almost 18 years of it, I can stand a few more months," she said, as she hurriedly brushed away the tears starting to form in her sad green eyes.

He gave her a smile that told her that he thought she was a strong girl for having to live with this torture. They had been together for half an hour and she hadn't seen him smile. _He should smile more often, he has a great one. _She thought_ What am I doing? Mallory interrupted his evening so he could check out some chick that isn't really crazy, why on earth would he smile? Even if his smile is amazing…stop it, Lena! He is probably old enough to be my father, I don't need to be thinking about his smile or how beautiful he is or how he is… STOP! You are going to drive yourself crazy if you keep doing this, just put up your barrier; don't let him in._

It was sad but very true. The tragic death of her parents was too much for a young girl of only four to deal with; so she formed a barrier around her heart. Nothing could get in and nothing could get out. She had never had any friends, because of the barrier, just a few acquaintances. She had also never had any boyfriends. But underneath the hardened black surface, she was a caring loving person. She was really nice to everyone else, but when someone tried to get in and love her back, she shut down completely and pushed them away.

"Well, you know that if something has happened, you need to tell me," he said. He knew from the moment he had walked in that she was one seriously messed up girl.

"I know." she thought of Joe. "Nothing has happened." she lied.

"Good." Jonathan had come from an abusive home also, so he knew what it felt like. He didn't want this girl to suffer more then she had to. Because she was going to suffer. Oh yes, she was, but not by her guardians' hands.

"So, give it to me straight, doc; are the men in white coats coming to take me to happy land?" she asked, trying to lighten the subject by being sarcastic. Yet her sarcasm was crushed by the sinking feeling in her stomach.

"Well, I am only an intern here," he said with a sigh. He had three more years to go as an intern when he should have just been promoted to head psychologist in the first place. "So I'm not the one who can tell you if you are insane or not, but from what I have gathered you seem pretty sane to me."

"Good, can I go now?" she asked. She was eager to get out of this place; something about it gave her a foreboding feeling. Like she knew something very bad was going to happen; what it was, she didn't know.

"Again, I am not the one to determine that. But we are probably going to have to put you on suicide watch."

"How long is suicide watch?"

"72 hours."

"Jesus! That is an entire three days!"

"Sorry," he said not really caring. He only needed a few hours of her 72 to see her fears and relish in her screams. "Well, I think that Doctor Smith is here."

"See you around," she called as he walked to the exit of the room.

"I doubt it." And he shut the door.

As soon as he shut the door he whispered, "Perfect." _My plan is working. _He thought._ All I have to do is get a few hours of her suicide watch for myself. She will be the first lucky person to have the honor of me testing my precious fear toxins on. Lucky her. _He spared himself one of his rare smiles and went to find Doctor Smith.


	2. Subject Suicide: 4 walls and a bed

"So what is wrong with our newest suicide patient?" asked Doctor Smith as Jonathan handed him the notes he had taken on Lena.

"She seems fine, or as fine as a suicide patient could be, but she wouldn't tell me why she put the knife to her wrist." Jonathan had a way of making people tell him what he needed to know, but Lena was different from everyone he had ever had to asses. She was a closed book, she refused to open up. "You can go in and see her if you need to,"

"No, I trust you. What did you think?"

"Well, like I said she seems fine," _I just told you, you bumbling idiot! _

"No, not medically, personally."

"She defiantly comes from an abusive home, so that is probably most of the problem." Jonathan didn't bother to tell him any more, he knew that Smith was bored with the topic already.

"Alright," Smith said with a sigh. "Get Janis to get set her up with a room for suicide watch."

"How long will the watch be?" Jonathan asked. He needed to know where she was going to be put and for exactly how long so he could test his toxins on her. All he needed was a few hours, and he was out of there. Even though this girl was beautiful, he couldn't risk the chance of falling for one of his test subjects. And besides, she was a patient at Arkham, if only for a short time. If he were to walk around with one of the patients, then people might think that he is insane also.

"72 hours, why do you need to know?" Smith smiled and said in a sarcastic voice, "Are you going to seduce her during her suicide watch?"

Jonathan forced a laugh and tried his hardest to keep his mouth from saying something that he would regret. "No, no. She is all yours."

"Technically no," the doctor frowned. "She is all yours."

"Excuse me?" Jonathan was utterly confused.

"Since you were the one who evaluated her and determined if she was sane or not, you are the one who gets to stay with her here."

Jonathan's face fell. "I am afraid I don't understand."

Smith sighed, "You need to stay with her and watch her for her 72 hour suicide watch." He patted Jonathan on the back, said, "Have fun," and walked away.

Jonathan stood there for a few minutes, trying to register what had just happened. _I have to stay with her for the **entire **72 hours? That is insane! All I need is an hour or so to test my toxins. I don't want to have to stay here for three days! I can understand staying over night to get work done, for I do it often. But three days! _He shook his head as he resigned himself to his fate. _Oh well, at least I can see what the toxin will do to her after the major effects wear off. _

After he went to Janis and got a room set up for Lena, he walked up to Mallory and Bob. "Mrs. Flowers?" She looked up from the magazine she had been reading. "We need to keep Lena here for the next 72 hours for suicide watch. Only then can the doctor make a sure diagnosis. You will get a call when she is ready for pick up. Now if you will excuse me, I have an important matter to attend to." And he walked away, leaving Mallory with a perplexed look on her ugly face.

He walked back into the room and Lena picked her head up off the table. Her eyes got a little bit wider and she said, "I thought that Doctor Smith was going to come in and put me into suicide watch."

"No, a family emergency has come up. But you do need to stay here for suicide watch."

She sighed. "Okay, but do I have to wear the jacket?"

"I think I can manage letting you slide on that particular detail as long as you promise not to try anything stupid, like trying to strangle yourself."

"I promise. So, am I going to have to stay in the room alone?"

"Not the entire time, no." _A few hours in she will be far from alone; she will have all her fears to fill her, and the Scarecrow to comfort her. _"I will be with you most of the time."

"Okay." They left to get Lena set up in her room, leaving the straight jacket behind.

Jonathan and Lena walked into the room and she looked around. The room was suicide proof. The long two-way mirror was a good four inches thick, so you couldn't break it, even if you did somehow manage to find something to throw at it. The bed was mattress, no sheets or anything. Not even a pillow. _I guess they thought that the person in this room would try to strangle themselves with the sheets, or suffocate themselves with the pillow. Damn. That is crazy, but then again, this is a place for crazy people. _The bed frame itself was concreted into the floor. The floor and walls were padded as was the ceiling. There was a clock on the wall, but it so far out of reach, that the metal cage they had around it was pointless. There was a desk, also concreted into the padded floor, but why it was there was beyond Lena to understand. There was nothing to do in the room that would require the use of the desk.

"If you need me," Jonathan said, breaking Lena out of her thought. "Just press the button under the mirror. It's a call button, normally I will answer, but if I can't make it there right away, one of the nurses will. Your food will be brought shortly." He made for the door.

"Mr. Crane?" she called.

He turned around, hand on the knob, and said, "Jonathan."

"Well, Jonathan, can you do me a favor?" He looked at her, his eyes telling her to go on. "I am going to be here for 72 hours, right so would it be possible to bring me some paper and pens?" Jonathan nodded.

"I'll see whatI can do."And hewalked out of the room, locking the door behind him.

The door shut and Lena stood there. She was stuck in this place for three whole days. She didn't know what she was going to do. The least these Arkham people could do was give her something to occupy her time. The caged clock on the wall said five to twelve, and all of the sudden she felt so incredibly tired, she didn't think that she could take another step. She dragged her feet over to the bed and flopped down upon it. As soon as her head hit the mattress, she was fast asleep.

Jonathan walked in a few minutes later, with her tray of food, paper, and pencils. He saw that she was almost dead to the world, so he laid down her things on the desk and exited as quietly as possible.

As soon as he was sure that the door was shut and locked, he pulled out his recorder and said into it, "Name of Subject S: Lena Serenity Bell. Age of subject: 17 years, 11 months and 1 day. Occupation: student at Gotham U and Temp. Subject S Subject Suicide.

"Subject S is currently sleeping due to fatigue, both mental and physical. It is," he paused to look at his watch, "as of now 2400 hours (12:00 am). I will watch Subject S for a few more hours to see what the reaction to the harsh conditions of Arkham will do to her. Not sure when the toxin will be most effective. Must learn more of what her fears are."

He turned the recorder off, straightened his jacket, and went to his office to get the toxins for when Lena woke up.

* * *

Author's note: Thanks so much for everyone who reviewed! It is by far one of the best feelings to know that people like your story! 

Blodeuedd (I hope I spelled that right): You are one of my favorite authors on fanfiction and to get a review from you saying that you like my story will get me through the entire school year with a happy attitude! I don't care if anyone else thinks it sucks, as long as you like it I shall be content. Thank you for the nice words of encouragement and I hope you will stay on board; it gets more interesting soon!

Johnny A. O: I did kinda get the mary-sue vibe from a few of my beta readers also, but I promise Lena isn't. And I can understand where you are coming from, in the first few chapters Lena is a bit one dimensional, but she gets deeper as the story goes on. I just didn't want to give away some of the major plot lines in the first chapter. But I promise you she will be more developed in the next few chapters. Thanks for reviewing!

Hope you enjoyed this one, and as soon as I can get my lazy ass to write it, I will post number 3.

Love,

Celia.


	3. Dreams and vampires

Lena's eyes opened suddenly accompanied by a gasp. She sat up so fast that she got dizzy and had to lie back down. "A dream, it was only a dream," she whispered to herself. For a while now, she had been having nightmares and every time she would wake abruptly in a cold sweat. The only problem was she never remembered the dream that scared her so. She had been told by Mallory several times that she talked in her sleep (Mallory used more violent, descriptive words then that, but you get the idea), and Lena didn't doubt it. But Mallory never really understood what Lena said in her sleep. "Most of the time you are just mumbling incoherently," Lena was surprised that Mallory even knew that incoherently was a real word. "But your mumbling is too loud! You keep me and Bob up all night long! We raised you and the thanks we get are being kept up all night by you mumbling incoherently all night!" And then Lena's notion that Mallory had never picked up a dictionary in her life was confirmed. She probably heard it off of TV. _Which reminds me I wonder when they need me at the studio today? Wait… _

"Shit!" She jumped off of the bed and looked at the clock; 12:05 PM. "Shit!" she repeated. She ran to the call button on the wall and pressed it. She screamed into the receiver, "JONATHAN!"

On the other side of the mirror Jonathan had came back to the mirror at around one in the morning after checking to make sure the toxins were ready for use; when he was going to use them, he still didn't know. He sat down on the chair in front of the mirror and turned the recorder on. "It is 1300 hours (1:00 AM) and Subject S is sleeping." He was about to finish his thoughts when something caught his attention. It sounded like a small child whimpering, but he knew that there wasn't anyone in the building, let alone small children. So that left himself and, "Lena?" he whispered. He went up to the mirror and pressed the sound button. The whimpering got louder and soon turned into full blown words.

"Don't! Stop! Get away from me! Mom, dad help me!" She was thrashing around on the bed, threatening to fall off. Jonathan hurriedly turned the sensitivity on the recorder to as high as it would go so it would catch all of this. It might be useful sometime soon. "Mom, dad! Help me! Stop him! Get him away from me!" _She is far too fluid with her thrashing movements. If tonight had been the first night that she was flailing in her sleep, it would have been erratic and jerky. She is fluid with the movements; that shows that tonight isn't the first restless night she has had._

She carried on with the floundering about the bed for a good hour or so. When 4 AM rolled around, her thrashing died down and there was no movement, save for the occasional twitch, and she was dead to the world once more.

Jonathan kept his recorder on, just incase, but slowly felt his head drooping on to his chest. He shook his head to get rid of the sleep, and focused on the movements of Lena.

At precisely 9 AM, his head fell back on the chair and he was, finally, asleep. He had fallen asleep with his feet up on the other chair in the room. He hardly ever slept anymore; he had nightmares to. But he always remembered his, and they were always the same.

It was basically a summary of his school life. The teasing, the taunts, the names. It wasn't that bad in the first few years of primary school, people were afraid of him, but they didn't understand, yet, just how much the taunts that would come later would hurt him. Middle school was cruel to Jonathan. That was where most of the juvenile pranks happened, such as a straw hat infested with bugs in his locker; jocks coming up behind him, yelling 'SCARECROW!' in his ear, picking him up, and stuffing straw in his clothes; just stupid stuff like that. High school is when things started to get violent. They would corner him in a dark alley and beat him until there was no hardly any feeling in his body. Even in bright day light at school with adults watching, they would hit him or push him; yet no one did anything about it.

Tonight he was reliving one of the lighter days of his tenth grade year. He had asked a girl, who had just moved to Gotham from New Orleans, out to homecoming, and she looked like she really wanted to go with him, but she was already going with the captain of the football team. Then his brain had to betray him and remind him of the next day where the boyfriend hunted him down. The fist was halfway to his face when a loud "JONATHAN!" shook him out of his dream, but also shook him to the floor.

"JONATHAN!" It was Lena. He looked at his watch and saw that it was 12:05 PM. _She was sleeping; so I probably didn't miss anything really important. At least I got some sleep. _

He picked himself off the floor and tried his best to sound as if he hadn't just woken up. "What?"

"My job! I need to go to my job! I can't afford to miss today! I need to…"

"Calm down Lena, your job situation is taken care of. The head psychiatrist…"

"Oh crap! They told my bosses that I am on suicide watch, didn't they! Now they will fire me for sure! No one wants a crazy person working for them," she said in distress.

"No, they didn't say anything of the sort. The head psychiatrist told your bosses that you were under to much stress with work, the up coming school year, and your family. They told your bosses that you were taking a few days off to recollect yourself so you don't have a mental breakdown while helping a customer. They all agreed to give you four days paid vacation," he said calmly.

"Oh," Lena said quietly. There were a few minutes of silence then she said, "Sorry. I was just worried I'd lose the jobs."

"Why though? You are going to get your parent's fortune in a month, why are you keeping these jobs?"

"It gives me time away from Mallory and the circus of freaks that live in the house." Then she was silent once more. Jonathan could see her, but she couldn't see him. She walked over to the food and started to eat, while the pencil she had just picked up was hovering over the paper. She didn't turn the call button off, so Jonathan asked,

"Why did you dye your hair black?"

Lena looked up at where she thought Jonathan would be behind the glass (her gaze missed by about a foot) and said, "People treat you differently when you are a blonde. They expect you to be happy and have a good attitude all the time. They gravitate towards you. When you have black hair and pale skin," she smiled to herself "people tend to stay away. They think you are a 'goth' and I prefer it that way. I like to be alone. I even got called a vampire, once."

"What did you do?"

"Went up to the girl and bared the fake vampire teeth I had borrowed from the TV station." She laughed and Jonathan smiled in spite of himself. He turned the call button off and said into the recorder he had picked up from the floor, "Subject S likes being alone and stays with jobs to get away from family." He didn't know if that would be helpful in his research of her fears, but, better safe then sorry.

* * *

So, this is chapter three. This isn't the best or longest one, but I wanted to post a chapter this weekend for all my wonderful readers! Thank you! I love you all! I think the next one will please all of you, hopefully. The real fun starts in the next chapter!

Some of you think that this is story is only going to be for the three days of suicide watch; sorry to disappoint you, but it isn't. If I was only going to base on the suicide watch I wouldn't get the point across I want to.

Olympia-mg: You are totally right! Thanks for pointing out the mary-sue thing for me. I didn't know that that was a mary-sue sentence. And all I was trying to do was get across the idea that Crane thinks this girl is beautiful, but his oh-so-lovely alter ego Scarecrow wants to hear her scream more then Jonathan wants to date her, because that internal fight comes into play later on. Does that make sense? I guess I didn't really make that clear enough, huh? And she gets darker, don't worry. Like I said earlier, I didn't want to give away the major plot points in the first few chapters.

Blodeuedd: I don't blame you at all for not reviewing because of school. I had four tests this week and just threw together this chapter tonight! And take your time reviewing! I'm not going to hunt you down or anything… or am I? (creepy music and thunder in the background) Nah, just so long you don't forget about me!

Thanks to everyone who read, I would be nothing without you! Oh, and I just enabled my fanfiction thingy so I can accept anonymous reviews, so don't be shy, please! I welcome constructive criticism! Even if you just want to say one word, just let me know you are out there so I can recognize you in my authors note!

Love,

Celia


	4. Constant voices and pointy things

Hi! Nothing to say up here but I don't own the song in paragraphs 30 and 31. It's name is 'She's Like the Swallow'. It was arranged by Carl Strommen. Alfred Choral Designs (I'm not sure what the last one has to do with the guy who made this song, but always better safe then sorry).

* * *

There was a constant voice in the back of Jonathan's head. Some would call it their conscience. But your conscience tells you what is right and what is wrong; this particular voice was the exact opposite. It voiced its opinion when not needed, it told Jonathan what he needed to do (although he hardly ever listened), and most of the time never shut up. The voice was, normally, small enough for Jonathan to block it out and carry on with his daily life, but it was oddly strong today. 

_There is something about that girl,_ it said. _I think you need to give her the toxins now._

Jonathan just ignored it, like he always did. Yet every time he ignored it, it would get louder. Finally it was so loud that Jonathan said, "NO! Will you please just SHUT UP and leave me alone! I will test her, but it is too soon." The voice in his brain wanted to do nothing but hear her screams. Jonathan did to, but there was more to the experiment then just screams. He also wanted to see the side affects and the after affects. But Jonathan was afraid that that wasn't the only reason holding him back from spraying her.

The voice did have a point, though. Jonathan needed to get on with the experiment.

"So, what is your greatest fear?" Jonathan asked Lena a little bit later.

"What on earth does that have to do with any thing?" she asked with a skeptical look on her face.

"Just answer the question," he said.

"I'm afraid of almost everything," she said quietly.

"Like what?"

"Name one relatively scary thing."

Jonathan searched his brain. "Uhh… Ghosts."

"Yep, I am afraid of almost all of those stupid made up things."

"Snakes?"

"Them and every other reptile known to man."

"Spiders?"

She shuddered. "I am probably have one of the biggest arachnophobias you will ever see. Not to mention the dark, all natural disasters, all bugs, and almost anything else you can think of. I would be here for an entire four days if I had to list all of my fears."

_Damn, this is one messed up girl._ He thought. "Well, are there things that you can't see that scare you? Like emotions or feelings?"

"Yes, but I'm not going to tell you. Those things are personal."

"But I am a psychiatrist in training; I can help you sort out all of these feelings."

"You may be a psychiatrist in training but I am only here for another 48 hours. It will take longer then 48 hours to sort out all of my problems."

"What do you do for fun?"

"I write stories and I do ballet; my specialty is Point."

"What's Point?"

"You dance on the very tips of your toes." And she was silent once more. She went back to the paper she had been writing on all day.

Jonathan was going to walk away, but his curiosity got the better of him. "What are you writing?"

"It's a story. I'm going to take an advanced writing class at Gotham U, so I wanted to get my writing skills oiled up so I'm not to rusty when school roles around."

_I wonder if she is taking a psychology class, it would be interesting to see how she reacts to the people in the class I am teaching._ He walked away and said into the recorder, after checking to make sure that Lena couldn't hear, "Subject S has told me what her fears are. In two hours time, I will test the toxins on her." He walked away, wondering which one of Lena's fears he will use against her.

* * *

Jonathan had his hand on the door to Lena's room, mask half way, on when he heard faint music. _Wait, there are no radios in this part of Arkham, there's not even anyone here but me and Lena._

The music was coming from Lena's room. Jonathan took his mask off and walked to the mirror. He pressed the sound button and what met his ears was a sad, mournful tune.

"She's like the swallow that flies so high, she's like the river that never runs dry, she's like the sun shine on the lee shore; I love my love and love is no more." Lena was on her toes, dancing. Jonathan vaguely remembered her saying something about her specialty in ballet. _What was it, sharp? No… but it had to do with something pointy. POINT! That was it, Point._ She was amazing at it. Her movements were as fluid and smooth as water. She looked as if she had practiced these moves more times then she had had to say her name.

"It's out of wild roses she made a bed, a stony pillow for her head. She laid her down no word she spoke, until this fair maid's heart was broke." Her voice was amazing also; just as fluid and smooth as her dance. Jonathan found himself feeling sorry for the maiden in the story. He shook his head to break the trance Lena's words had over him, but it was no use. It was to mesmerizing to look away, let alone go in there and make her stop. "She's like the swallow that flies so high, she's like the river that never runs dry. She's like the sun shine on the lee shore; I love my love and love is no more." She finished a pirouette and stood there. She sank to her knees and with tears slowly falling to the ground, she finished the song. "I love my love and love is no more." She let out a sob and her shoulders heaved up and down.

There was a sudden pang of pity in Jonathan's heart. With all thoughts of the experiment pushed from his mind, he wanted to go in there and put his arms around her. Kiss her like she had never been kissed before, if only for a moment. Just some sign of affection to let her know that she is loved. _Whoa! Hold on there, Jonathan. _Said the voice in the back of his head. _She is a test subject; you can't be feeling these things! You were about to go in there and relish in her fears! She is in a vulnerable state and that is the perfect time to test the toxins on her!_

Jonathan was having an internal crisis. He did need to test the toxins, but he was feeling these odd feelings for Lena that he had never felt before. He looked at her, sobbing on the cold padded floor, and he wanted nothing more then to go in there and show her that he cares about her.

He shook his head and chalked the feelings up to not enough sleep. _I'm not thinking straight. _He thought._ I'll just go home and sleep it off. Tomorrow will be better. I won't hesitate or stop for anything. _He told himself. But he never believed himself.

* * *

Sorry for the delay. I have been really sick with the flu and it is kind of hard to write a story when you are praying to the porcelain god. But I took a bunch of Advil so the room would stop spinning long enough for me to write this chapter; it's not as long as I would have hoped, but it will have to make do for now. 

Olympia-mg and Blodeuedd: Thank you two for always remembering to review. I will be sure to thank each of you individually in the next chapter. But the Advil is wearing off and the room is slowly starting to spin again.

Thank all of you for reading my story, I love you all!

Love,

Celia


	5. RAG and grasping for conversation

When Jonathan got home to his small, dingy house all he could think about was Lena. The way her hair fell around her face, the way her green eyes seem to glow in those terrible florescent lights, the way her lips formed when she was singing… _Jonathan, stop! You can't be feeling these things! She is a test subject! _Said the voice.

Jonathan was tired of the voice telling him what to do. He had had enough. "You know what? I think that it is you who has held me back all these years. You are constantly hissing in the back of my head and that is why I hardly ever talk to any one. You have told me for as long as I can remember that I 'wasn't good enough to talk to that girl', or 'she thinks I am stupid and I shouldn't waist my time on her'." As realization dawned on him, Jonathan's face fell into a stunned look. He let out a few hollow laughs. "You have been controlling every aspect of my life for more then half of it." He got angry, "You need to get out of my head. I am sick of you! You need to go away and haunt someone else's mind." He thought, _I just want to be that innocent little kid again, the kid who didn't know what crazy people sound like when they scream; the innocent adolescent who didn't know what it is like to have a constant voice in the back of his head. _

_But Jonathan,_ said the voice. It had taken on a soft, kind tone. _You don't want to go back to that mind set. You were weak and helpless back then._

"You mean that I was weak and helpless without you, that's what you are trying to say. Well, I don't want you any more. I am old enough to take care of my own problems without you!"

_You WILL listen to ME! _Said the voice. Now it was mad.

"NO! I refuse to listen to you any more!" Jonathan was almost screaming. Then he got deathly quite. "I… refuse… to listen to you any more." The voice got quiet and didn't say anything more for the rest of the night. Jonathan thought that he was gone for good. But how wrong he was.

Jonathan was always the first one at the asylum. Often times he had to wait for the person that had the keys to unlock the doors for him. There was a note on Jonathan's desk when he got in the next morning. He picked it up and it said:

I know what you are doing in your spare time. I am intrigued and would be willing to pay just to meet you. Be at your office phone at 12 am. Make sure no one taps the phone line and make sure no one follows you. Throw away this note as soon as you read it. Tear it up into eighths if you want me to call, tear it into fourths if you don't. I hope you will be waiting for the call.

RAG

"What the hell?" Jonathan knew that one of the idiots he works with would think that it would be a hilarious joke to get his hopes up, so he was about to just crumple up the note and throw it away, when someone knocked on the open door.

Jonathan turned his head and saw one of the nurses. "Jonathan, Lena is asking for you."

He nodded and went to throw away the note. He aimed for the trash, but missed. He didn't see it though; he was rushing out of the room to see what Lena needed. The nurse went into the office and saw the note on the floor. She didn't even read it, she just picked it up and tore it into eight pieces; eight has always been her lucky number.

"Yes Lena?" he asked.

"Oh, I just wanted to know if you were here yet. I thought maybe you had forgotten me.

"I could never forget you," he whispered; Loud enough for him to hear, but soft enough to make sure she couldn't. _This is really peculiar._ He thought. _The voice hasn't talked all morning and all I could think about was her. I think it has finally listened to me. _Jonathan felt a surge of pride. He thought he had finally overcome the voice.

"So, how much longer is this watch?" she asked.

"A little under 24 hours."

"Oh. Thanks. So, what do you do in your spare time?"

"Well, I teach a class at Gotham U…"

"Which one?" she asked eagerly.

"Psychology."

"Oh, I think I am taking that class this year. What else?"

"Well, in between the class and the internship, I really don't have that much time to do anything. I read,"

"Like what?"

"Psychology books."

"Cool." She was silent for a moment. "Sorry, I was just grasping for conversation. I am really bored."

"I can see. Well, I am getting a page from Doctor Smith," he lied. He needed to get away to clear his head.

"Okay."

A few minutes after he left, all Lena could think about Jonathan. The jet black hair, the pale skin, and those amazing eyes!

She was day dreaming about him when the door opened. She figured that it was Jonathan, so she didn't look up.

"Well hello beautiful," said a familiar voice. But just because it was familiar doesn't mean it didn't strike fear into poor Lena's heart.

She looked up slowly into two big fiery brown eyes.

Jonathan went to his office and shut the door behind him. He had never felt anything like this before. He had never liked any one before. Did he like her? Did he… dare he think it… love her? He sat in his office and thought about it for a long time, he lost track after a half an hour.

He got up and figured he should check on Lena. He heard something, but couldn't make out what it was. As he got closer to Lena's room, it became apparent that she was crying.

"Lena, what is the matter?" She was sitting on the floor, sobbing.

"J-Jonathan," she wept. He entered in the code and wrenched open the door. He rushed to her side. He had never been in a situation were he had to comfort a crying person so he didn't know what to do. All of the sudden, she hugged his body as tight as possibly, like she never wanted to let go and Jonathan tensed up. He didn't remember the last time he had been hugged. He slowly put his arms around her, body still tense, and patted her back.

"What's the matter?" he asked.

"Jonathan! He came and got the door open and he hurt me and threatened to kill me if I told any one what he did to me…" Her words were jumbled and strung together; Jonathan didn't understand what she was saying.

"Slow down. Who got in here, the only way that someone can get in here is with the code. Who threatened to kill you?"

She took a few deep breaths to steady her voice and said, "Okay," tears were streaming down her face. "I will tell you what happened. But I have to start from the beginning."

* * *

I know that once again this isn't the best of work, but I just finally got over being sick and you would not believe the make up work that can accumulate over just two days. I have nine days of PE to make up because I tripped going up some stairs last week and broke a toe and you can't really play soccer if your toe is broken. So, I tried my hardest to rush with this one so I could get it up for all of my wonderful readers. I LOVE YOU ALL!

Now, I don't know if any of you caught this in the last chapter, but mostly in this one, that I have decided to make Scarecrow Crane's alter ego. I know that I am changing a character that isn't my own, but it will just be easier to understand what kind of internal battle that he is going through if I make it like that.

Blodeuedd- Thank you for being my constant support! Here have an e-cookie!

Jessamyn Dreamer- Well, you do have a point, it is really hard to sing and do ballet at the same time. I've tried, and it didn't work out to well. And actually I do sing, write, and do a little bit of ballet. But I don't have a job at an asylum. If I could find one where Crane was working, though, I would be one of the first one's to apply! But you did make a valid point; I am in the highest choir in my school and I can't do ballet and sing at the same time. Now I understand why all of the ballets don't have any speaking parts to them. I was just trying to get across the idea that she can be a dark person, but she can be graceful and beautiful at the same time. Oh, and any Mary-sue's you see, please point out so I can tweek my story to make less of a Mary-sue. Or change her a little for the next chapters. Thanks for reviewing! Here have a few e-cookies!

PS-In your next review can you tell me what TTBOMK means? Thanks!

Olympia-mg- Yeah, ch. 4 was a bit schmaltzy. But I didn't want the internal battle between Crane and Scarecrow to be stretched out for forever, so I needed to move Crane's feelings a bit faster then normal. Plus, I am trying to make it so that Crane isn't so bad. Yes, I know that he is a bad guy, but… man I wish I could tell you more! I promise the reason that he isn't going to be so mean to certain people will all be explained! I promise! (Crap! I bet that didn't make any sense, did it? I promise that it will all be explained!) Thanks for reviewing! Have an e-cookie!

I'm sorry for all the fogginess in the story and in the holla-back reviews (don't you love that? Holla-back reviews? My sister said it one day and I think that it is genius!) but all will be explained in due time. Love to everyone who read! Oh! I think that I have this Friday off from school! If that is the case then I will have an extra day to make sure that the next chapter is long and is crafted better then this one!

Love,

Celia


	6. The beginning and an English accent

"When I was 15 years old, Joe came up to me and said that I was beautiful. That I deserved better then how Mallory and Bob were treating me." She remembered the day like it was yesterday.

"You really are a pretty girl," Joe said. "You deserve better then how Mallory and Bob are treating you." He sat down next to her on the sofa. Mallory and Bob were out for the night and Joe was supposed to watch Lena.

"Thank you." Lena was trying to read her Spanish book for homework due the next day. She had learned to take everything that they said with a grain of salt and not to take everything at face value.

"What are you reading?" he asked with a fake interested tone.

"Spanish." _What the hell does he want? _

"I took Spanish, maybe I can help you."

Lena let out a snort. "No, you failed Spanish. Anyway, I don't need help. I can do this on my own."

"Okay." He seemed to really search his peanut sized brain for what to say. "How is ball et going?"

Lena rolled her eyes. "It is ballet, not _ball et_. I dropped out."

"Why?"

"It was to much work to do ballet every day after school plus my homework."

Joe moved closer. "Well, maybe I can take some of that work off your hands."

"Joe, you are a drop out. I don't think you could do any of my work." She knew what he really meant, but maybe if she pretended like she didn't he would go away.

"Well, maybe if I could relax you, you would be able to take it up again." He was far to close for comfort.

She hopped off the sofa and said, "No." She started to walk away, but Joe came up behind her and grabbed her hips.

"Let…go… of me," she said, ice dripping off of every word.

"You will do as I say," he whispered in her ear.

"NO!" Lena tried her hardest to get out from his grip, but she wasn't as strong as him. She had always been frail and Joe was the quarter-back for the high school football team.

"To bad I have to do this to you," he whispered. "You could have made it easy, and just give in. But it's to late now. I have to force you into it." He grabbed the rope he had been hiding under his shirt and tied her mouth with a make shift gag. Then her hands and feet. Then he violated her body without a shred of shame.

When he was done, he threw her clothes back to her and as soon as she was finished dressing he put his hand to her throat and threw her against the wall. "If you tell any one, I will kill you and the person you told," with the same fire in his brown eyes as he had had when he came into her cell.

Lena looked up at Jonathan. "And it's not like I didn't try to fight him, he left with a few scars. But the more I hurt him, the more he hurt me. After that was the first time I tried to commit suicide. But, I know that you will think I am crazy, I stopped because the spirit of my mother told me not to, she said I had so much more to live for. "

"Lena." Jonathan was speechless. In his year of internship at Arkham, he had never come across a situation that was this bad.

"And he did it again," she choked out. "The night I came to Arkham. That is why I tried to commit suicide again; but my mother stopped me like she did the last time." She sobbed on Jonathan's shoulder for a few hours. When she was finally clam enough to go on, Jonathan asked her,

"You said something about someone coming in here and threatening to kill you. Who was it?"

"It was Joe. He came in here wanting to know if I had told you anything," once again she was forced to relive the horrible minutes that Joe was in her presence.

She was day dreaming about Jonathan when the door opened. She figured that it was him, so she didn't look up.

"Well hello beautiful," said a familiar voice. But just because it was familiar doesn't mean it didn't strike fear into poor Lena's heart.

She looked up slowly into two big fiery brown eyes. Lena tried to scream, but before a breath of air could leave her mouth, Joe put his hand on it. "We wouldn't want any one to hear you, would we?" He gave a maniacal laugh and whispered in her ear, "But then again, you are in a loony bin. The people here would just chalk it up to another crazy going," he smiled like he did on that night so many months ago, "crazy."

Lena's eyes were wide with fear. Her brain had went into shock and she didn't know how to get his hand off of her face so she could scream for help. Then the practical side of her brain (the one that stays calm in a bad situation) said, _Bite him, stupid!_

Lena's teeth sunk into Joe's flesh and she tasted blood. He let out a howl of pain and moved back. Lena dodged out from under him and started to scream, "JONATHAN! JONATHAN, HELP! JONA…" he caught her neck with his other hand and threw her against the wall.

He lifted her up and said, "You little BITCH! Who have you told! WHO!"

Lena kicked the air and tried to scream again, but she could hardly breathe, let alone call out for help. "I don't know what you are talking about," she managed to say.

"You know what! Who have you told about me!"

"No one, I swear!" She gasped for air.

"LIAR!" he screamed.

"I… I can't breath!" She thought she was going to die.

Joe was about to scream at her again when he heard something. Lena heard it to; the glorious sound of very faint footsteps. Someone was coming to save her!

Joe looked back at Lena with murder in his eyes. "It sounds like your beloved _doctor _is coming to save you," he whispered. Lena's eyes got wider, if it was even possible. "What you didn't know that I knew about your little _crush_ on him? I've known all along. The way you look at him; I knew you loved him before you did. And now I am going to break him."

"No!" was all Lena managed to cough out.

"Oh yes. I am going to kill him in the most brutal way imaginable." He could see the fear in her eyes because he went on. "I would love to tell you all of the gory and wonderful details, but I don't want to get caught before the big finale, now do I." He gave Lena one more squeeze to her neck and dropped her on the floor. He ran out the room and shut the door behind him. Lena sat trembling on the cold padded floor. He had shut the door and she couldn't get out. The door can only be open end from the outside. She couldn't warn Jonathan that Joe was coming to get him and hurt him. For a while she sat in shock, not being able to cry, until the realization hit her. Joe was going to kill Jonathan and there was nothing she could do about it.

Lena looked up at Jonathan and he noticed the purple rings around her neck in the shape of hand that were far too large to be her own. "He said he was going to kill you," she said hysterically. He said he was and he will! There is nothing he won't do to make sure that no one finds out his secret!" A fresh flow of tears came and went with Jonathan whispering reassuring words like, "Shh, its okay, he is gone," and "I'm here, you will be fine. I won't let anyone hurt you."

After a while, Jonathan looked at his watch and it said 12:05 am. "Just a few more hours and you are officially off your suicide watch." He paused and looked at the top of her beautiful head. "I have to go get your papers ready for your release, okay. Will you be fine by yourself?"

She took in a deep shuddering breath and said, "I think I'll be okay."

Jonathan left the room and went back to his office. _Jonathan, she comes with far too much baggage. I think that you need to go in there and test her. _It was the voice again.

"Why won't you just leave me alone!" he screamed at his head.

_Jonathan, this girl is in the perfect mental state for the toxins to take effect. And you can't possibly be falling in love with this girl. She comes with far to much baggage. Would you really want to be associated with a crazy person like her?_

"She isn't crazy! She is just going through a really hard time. Her brother raped her twice and threatened to kill her god knows how many times! You are really pathetic, you know. First you say that I am not good enough for her and now you are trying to tell me that I'm too good for her? What kind of screwed up voice are you?"

_I am just…_it started.

"Get OUT of my head!" Jonathan screamed. He was to busy trying to get the voice out by yelling at it, he didn't notice Joe coming up behind him with a gun in his hand. "I don't know why you think that I am going to listen to you; I am just going to ignore you like I did the last time!" He sighed, not knowing that Joe now had the gun aimed at his head. "I think I love her, and I refuse to let you screw this up for me!" Joe had his hand on the trigger when someone came up behind Joe and hit him over the head with a pole with a loud "CRACK!" Jonathan gasped with fright and whipped around. He saw Joe sway there for a second, and then his unconscious body hit the floor to reveal behind him a tall man dressed in black.

"Who the hell are you!" Jonathan asked, scared out of his wits.

The man took his mask off and spoke with a hint of an English accent, "I am…"

* * *

I am going to be evil and stop right there! It will be explained in the next one, but cliffhangers are important. I love cliffhangers (but only if I am writing them!)!

Olympia-mg- I hope that this chapter answers most of your questions. But all of you questions will eventually be answered, some sooner then others. And I am really glad that I have you approval for the 'Jeckyll/Hyde' thing. Have some e-candy! I have some e-caramel, e-chocolate, and (just for my friend Angel (she isn't on fanfiction)) some e-peanut butter sandwiches!

Jessamyn Dreamer- Thanks for the wonderful review. To tell you the truth, I thought you would take my hollaback review to yours as an insult, so I am really happy you aren't mad. Have some e-candy! The e- peanut butter sandwiches are great, but I prefer the chocolate my self. Thank you!

The Dancing Egg- I love your name! Thanks for reviewing but sorry, I don't have AIM.

Dave-The-Laughs-NewHotness- Boy, that is one confusing (but really cool) name. I hope I spelled it right! Thanks for the wonderful review!

Blodeuedd- You know, I was going to stop the internal dialogue between Crane and Scarecrow, but you have a valid point. With out the fighting between those two, my story would be nothing but fluff. So, I am going to bring 'the voice' back a little more often. Thanks! Have some e-candy!

Thanks to everyone who read the last chapter! All of you get e-candy! See if any of you can guess who the man in black is.

Love,

Celia


	7. Doing what is necessary

The man took his mask off and spoke with a hint of an English accent, "I am Ra's al Ghul."

"Get out of my asylum or I will call the police." Jonathan was halfway to the phone when the Ra's person spoke again.

"I believe I just saved your life, the least you could do is give me a thank you. And besides, you are the one who agreed to meet with me. Why would you call the authorities on your guest?"

Jonathan opened his mouth and was about to bite back with a really good comeback, when he realized, "The note was from you! How did you find out about my experiments?"

"If you and I are going to be partners, then you must realize that I have eyes every where, Mr. Crane."

"Who said anything about me wanting to be your partner?"

"Well, I haven't told you my master plan yet, and I think that you will like it. We are going to bring Gotham to its knees with fear, hold it for ransom, and even if they do pay us we will watch as Gotham rips itself apart."

_Hmm,_ said the voice. _Sounds tempting. Say yes. _

'No,' Jonathan told the voice.

_It could be fun._

'No!' "I am sorry Mr. al Ghul, but I will have to decline."

"Why? What on earth could be any better then what your heart desires most; fear. Fear instilled in all living creatures; fear striking at the heart when they see your face." Ra's had a look on his face that was very hard to make out. Jonathan couldn't tell if his eyes were burning with passion for his job, or with hatred for having to ask someone so beneath him for help.

_How does he know all of that? _Said the voice. And as the voice said it, Jonathan found it leaving his lips to.

"I also have ears everywhere."

"But what do I have to do with your 'master plan'? I am just a simple psychiatrist, what on earth could I possibly have to offer for this endeavor of yours?"

"Simple. I need your fear toxin."

"That is incredibly expensive to make."

"The finances are all taken care of. All I need is your help."

Jonathan thought about it and said, "I am sorry, but I will still have to decline. As much as I want for everyone who has ever hurt me to pay, I don't think that it is such a good idea." _Maybe he is the one who needs to be in Lena's cell next. _Jonathan thought.

Ra's sighed and said, "Well, then I am sorry for what I am about to do." He attacked Jonathan. Ra's spun Jonathan around and put his arm around his throat and his other hand around his middle.

"What are you doing!" asked Jonathan.

"What is necessary. Walk to Lena's cell." Jonathan knew that resistance would only lead to him getting hurt, so he walked to Lena's cell with Ra's vice grip still intact.

"Do you see what I would be forced to do if you were to decline again?" He forced Jonathan's head in the direction of the two way mirror and a horrible sight met his eyes. A man, dressed in the same outfit as Ra's, had picked Lena up by her neck, pushed against the wall, and had a knife to her throat. Jonathan tried his hardest to get out of Ra's grip and save Lena, but Ra's was a much stronger man.

"Let her GO!" Jonathan yelled.

"She is sedated and won't be waking up for a few hours. And my student in there won't do anything unless I give him the word. If you decline again, I am sorry to say that he will kill her."

"Fine! I will do what ever you want just let her go! But there is one thing that I need."

"What?"

"I don't want any part of the plan. I will provide you with the toxin, and you will provide me and Lena an antidote for when you get this in the air. But I don't want to go any further in this 'partnership' then that."

"Fine by me," he said. And all of the sudden, he and his 'student' were gone; Lena back safely on her bed.

"Where did you go?"

"I have to run," came Ra's voice. It seemed to be coming from everywhere. "I have a guest arriving soon and it is an awfully long way to my house. If you need me, just talk to Bob Flowers." And Ra's was gone.

Once Ra's and his student were a safe distance from any prying ears the student asked, "Sensei, I thought we were going to cleanse Gotham by putting the toxin in the air, not holding it for ransom."

"I know, but I thought that that would be the only way to get Crane to give us the toxins. I underestimated his love for that girl. I guess if we ever need anything from him that he is hesitant to let go of, we know who to turn to."

* * *

Okay, this is the shortest one yet and I know that I can do much better and make it much longer, but I have to rake 4 yards this weekend and a dance at my high school is on Saturday evening. So I didn't have much time to piece together a Mona Lisa. But thank you to all who reviewed and all who took it! Can you believe that after only six chapters, all of you helped my break the 1000 hits mark! WOOHOO! (throws party for every one who read) All of you get e-pizza, e-cake, e-soda (your choice), and an e-piñata! Plus as a memorable gift to show you my appreciation, you all get a song with Jonathan! 

Jonathan- What! When did I agree to this!

Celia- You didn't. I made the decision for you.

Jonathan- Girl don't make me go postal on you!

Celia- Where did that come from? You sounded just like the inmate cheerleaders from The Longest Yard!

Jonathan- I have no idea. I think my brain had momentary laps of judgment and my speech got chaotic. I think that my neurons weren't depolarizing and the synapses in my brain didn't connect and I said that I repeated an inane line from that movie you made me sit through last night but added in my own words.

Celia: OO Okay, what ever you say. But there is a reason I made you sit through that movie. I have strict orders from Blodeuedd to make you watch funny and fun stuff. Not your normal morbid crap. If I had my way you would be nothing but a fluff story!

Jonathan: Thank God for your beta readers!

Celia: You do realize that this doesn't excuse you from the songing I promised my readers. (Turns back to readers) He'll come around eventually. Thank all of you so very much!

Love,

Celia


	8. Pressing charges and home

Okay, I am just warning you that this one is uber-short! I know that I always have excuses, but this one is really important! My first Speech and Debate meet is the 4th and I have only a week to memorize a 10 minute long poem and a 10 minute long dramatic piece. I have the dramatic piece, but only a week to memorize it and I don't think I can get though it without sobbing like a baby because it is so FREAKING SAD! And I have the poem, but when I read it out loud, it is only 3 minutes. And then I have to start practicing for the town talent show and my partner is being a complete and total ASS! And I have to practice for all-state choir tryouts, which I am going to miss because of my meet so I will have to make those up! Plus on top off all of that, my midterms are next week! I am having a mental breakdown from all that I have to memorize! I feel like my brain is going to explode! But, I will try my hardest to make this one is good (even if it is really short) but my beta reader (who is also my partner for the talent show) is being an ASS and my sister is gone for the week. My parents haven't seen the movie yet and my brother doesn't care. So, I will try to make this one good. I thank all of you for putting up with me and my short stories! (Oh, and I am to lazy to go back and fix it, but when Ra's said, "If you need me, just talk to Bob Flowers." What I meant for him to say was "If you need me, approach Bob Flowers and ask for Henri Ducard. He will know how to contact me." Thanks!)

* * *

Jonathan walked back into Lena's room and looked at her, sleeping peacefully on the bed. He brushed a hair away from her face. He looked at his watch. 2:30 AM. Lena's suicide watch was officially over. Jonathan sighed, he didn't want to leave Lena, for fear of someone else coming in and trying to hurt her, but he needed to get her papers ready for her release. 

He walked into his office and saw the unconscious Joe on the floor. It took all of Jonathan's strength to pick the muscular boy up and set him on his office couch. _I also need to get a file report on Joe for raping Lena. _He thought. He had a busy morning ahead of him.

At noon Lena woke up and the memories of last night enveloped her like a wave of pain. She was sore all over from being tossed around and wanted to be in Jonathan's arms. That was the only place she had ever really felt safe. After he had held her last night while she told him about Joe, she had formed a bond with him. But the bond was far beyond a psychiatrist and his patient. And Lena wasn't sure, but it may have even gone beyond two good friends. She was hoping that it was the next level. She was also hoping he felt the same way.

Jonathan was on his way to release Lena, papers for her release and papers for the lawsuit against Joe in his hand, when he ran into the problem of what to do with Joe. _I can't have the police come and take him until I can get a statement from Lena telling them why they should arrest him. _Joe was still out cold, so Jonathan left Joe in his office, but locked the door from the outside so he couldn't get away if he woke up before the police got there.

Jonathan opened the door to Lena's room and she flew into his arms. "Thank you so much Jonathan. I don't know what would have happened to me if Joe had…" she mumbled something into his shoulder that was incoherent so Jonathan said,

"It is quite all right Lena. I will always help you. I have your release papers here."

Lena broke the embrace and looked at Jonathan. "You mean it? I am free?"

"Yes."

Her face lightened up and she hugged him again. "But there is a serious matter I must discuss with you." Lena nodded so he continued. "Joe did try to kill me last night and he rapped you twice. We can get him for the wrongs he has done. We can file a report on him, and I will get the best lawyer in town and we can put him away for good. He will never hurt anyone again."

Lena thought about it and looked down. "I just am so afraid that he won't get convicted and he will come after me." She looked in Jonathan's eyes, "I don't want to get hurt again. But I will do it. I will help you and give you my statement for the trial."

"Good. I have Joe unconscious in my office…"

"What?"

Jonathan bit his lip. He didn't want to tell Lena about Ra's or his experiments. So he had to tell her a lie. "There was an old friend of my family in my office and he had knocked Joe out before he had a chance to shoot me. Henri Ducard is his name. I can have him testify that Joe was going to assassinate me. I am going to call the police and I need you to tell them what happened, okay?"

Lena looked very pale, but nodded.

The next thing Jonathan knew, the police were taking Joe under their custody for repeated rape and attempted murder. Jonathan and Lena watched as the car carrying Joe pulled away and drove in the direction of the jail. Lena gave a sideways glance at Jonathan and said, "I guess I go home."

Jonathan turned to face Lena and said, "No, you can't go back there and be subjected to that abuse again."

"Well, where do I go, then?"

Jonathan paused and then said, "You come home with me."

* * *

I know that that is really short, but I am doing my best here. Shout out to Shari Kaminski and Blodeuedd for reviewing! Thank you all for reading! You guys are what keeps be going and from breaking down completely from mental stress! e-Snickers to all of you who read and reviewed! I love you all! 

Love,

Celia


	9. A vist to mommy dearest

15 minutes later, Lena was taking a tour of Jonathan's house. "It's not that much; one bedroom, one bathroom, a kitchen, living room, and dining room." And of course, Jonathan's extra room. It was the unfinished room in the very back of the house. Jonathan had put some special additions in the room, of course, but it wasn't fit for someone to sleep in. And for the first time in his life, Jonathan was embarrassed that he didn't have a big fancy home where he could show Lena nice things. He almost didn't want to show her his bedroom; he hadn't cleaned it in a while. The bed was unmade and there were clothes strewn all over the floor. Lena didn't seem to mind, but that didn't stop Jonathan from being embarrassed.

It got late and both Jonathan and Lena were tired. While Jonathan changed in his room, Lena waited and explored for herself. _I really hope she doesn't look in the extra room. This reminds me, I should probably get a dead bolt for the door. _

And Jonathan's heart dropped as he heard a, "Oh my god!" from the other side of the door. In nothing but his boxers, Jonathan rushed out of the room to find Lena. All he could think was, _Shit! She opened the door to my experiment room! She found out about my toxins! _Jonathan skidded onto the tile where Lena was standing. He tried to keep his balance, but ended up on the floor. Lena turned around from the bookcase she had been staring at and started to laugh "Let me help you up." As she reached for Jonathan's arm she asked, "What was so important that you had to rush in here with out clothes on?"

"I heard you say 'oh my god', and I thought that you might have hurt yourself."

"Oh, that is sweet, but I was just exclaiming about your absolutely fabulous book collection."

_Thank god she didn't find the toxin room. _he thought. "You like it?"

"It's wonderful! You have all of my most favorite books and poem collections."

"I have been collecting since I was a kid. I wasn't really into sports, so I collected books and studied."

"Do you like to watch sports?"

Jonathan thought about it and said, "Not really, I don't think that I have ever even watched a game of basketball before."

"That's okay, I hate most sports to. I don't like to play any of them, and I don't like to watch too many of them. I don't really like basketball and I hate football with a passion."

"As do I."

"The only things I really like watching is Baseball and Rugby."

"Rugby?"

"Yeah. It is kind of like football without pads. They only have ten guys and they have a longer field."

"Oh. And baseball?"

"Hell yes! I am a hardcore Yankees fan!" Jonathan let out a snort. "Don't laugh at me!"

"I wasn't laughing," he tried to keep a straight face.

Lena took a book off of the shelf and hit him on the arm. "Snorting leads to laughing!" She shook her head, "Go put some clothes on."

As soon as Jonathan was in the safety of his bedroom he let out a long sigh of relief and made a mental note, _Get deadlock for toxin room._

Lena borrowed some of Jonathan's nightclothes to change into. "I don't want to kick you out of your bed, I don't think that's fair," Lena protested.

"I am the one who is the host here, I say what will happen. And I say that you sleep in my bed. I will be fine on the couch."

"Are you positive?"

"Of course I am positive, Lena. I am a doctor, you know." Lena laughed and after much more protesting, Jonathan ended up on the couch.

The next morning Jonathan woke up with a sore back and a tired head. _I really need to go shopping for a new couch. _He hadn't gotten more then a few hours sleep.

He trudged into the kitchen to find Lena bright eyed and wide awake. "Hello Jonathan. How are you this morning?"

"Wonderful," he said, popping his back. "And you?"

"Perfect! Your bed is so comfortable!" She motioned to a chair to get Jonathan to sit down. As he flopped down she said, "Thank you for letting me sleep here, I don't think that I would be able to face Mallory. Especially after we just put her pride and joy behind bars."

"Anytime, Lena."

"So, I guess I will go home tonight."

"No, you stay here. Mallory will take advantage of your vulnerable state right now; she could possibly even drive you to suicide again."

"Are you sure that you want me to stay with you?"

"Positive," he said. Then, the voice came back, _Jonathan, you have her staying at you home! She is in your grasp! She trusts you! You need to break that bond of trust before it gets any deeper and give her a dose of the toxins! _Jonathan just ignored it and pushed it to the back of his mind.

The next day, Lena needed clothes. All she had were the clothes from the Asylum and you can only wear the same set of clothes so many times. "Well, what should I do?" Lena asked Jonathan.

"You do need clothes," Jonathan said. He paused and thought for a while then said, "I will come with you to Mallory's house and we can get some clothes and personal items for you."

The next thing Jonathan knew, he was at Mallory's house. He parked the car at the curb and looked over at Lena. She was as pale as a ghost and trembling so hard Jonathan was surprised the she didn't fall out of the seat. Her eyes went wide as she looked at the house. "Lena," Jonathan said. He reached out and took her hand. "I promise it will be fine. We'll get in and out as fast as we possibly can." She looked back at him and squeezed his hand to let him know that she trusted him.

"Mallory?" Lena called as she walked into the seemingly deserted house. She made a hand motion telling Jonathan to follow her. They walked into Lena's bedroom and she pulled a suitcase out of her closet. She dumped everything she could find in that one tiny case.

Her room was interesting to Jonathan. She had papers with half written ideas scrawled in messy handwriting posted up next to the posters of old and new movies. There were pictures of her and a group of people he had never seen before and a series of pictures of two adults holding a growing child.

"The pictures of the group of people are me and my speech and debate team. They were the only people who really accepted me for who I was," explained Lena.

"And the adults with the child are you and your parents," finished Jonathan.

"Yep. I have a bunch of pictures under my bed of them and me. They were picture fanatics. Anything that was even remotely worth remembering, the brought out the camera." Her voice constricted as she finished the sentence. Jonathan walked over and put his hand on her shoulder. She smiled at him through watery eyes and finished putting the pictures in the suitcase.

"Okay, all set," said Lena. Just as they were about to leave her room Mallory walked through the doorway.

"Mallory?" said Lena. She started to tremble again and became very pale.

"What the fuck are you doing here you little whore!" Mallory spat out. She reeked of alcohol and was slurring her words terribly; Jonathan was surprised that he could understand what she was saying.

"I was just getting some of my things," Lena said in a meek voice. "I am staying at Jonathan's…"

"Really! How many times have you been nailed? You little hoe! You brought him here to fuck! Is his house not clean enough for you? Huh?"

"I think it's time we left Lena," said Jonathan. He stepped in front of Lena and tried to get Mallory to move from the door way but she wouldn't budge.

"You thought that you would be able to piss me off enough if you brought him here to screw each other right after you put my baby in Jail! You lied to the cops you little bitch! Joey would never hurt anyone!"

"I think that is quite enough Mrs. Flowers! Now if you will excuse us, we have far more important matters to attend to then listening to your incessant bitching regarding something you obviously don't have the faintest idea about. Moreover, what Lena and I do in our spare time is none of you business. Do you honestly think that if we were 'fucking', as you so crudely put it, that you would be the first one to know? I don't think so."

Mallory just stood there, confused by Jonathan's words. He didn't think that she had ever heard most of those words before and it stumped her to the point of being immobilized in thought for a second. He took hold of Lena's hand and pushed Mallory out of the way. "Come back here you little bastard! I am not finished with the whore yet!" Mallory tripped Lena and grabbed her other hand and tried to pull her in the opposite direction. She got close enough to hit Lena a few times before Jonathan wrenched her from Mallory's vice grip. He helped Lena stand up and rushed her to the car, the suitcase forgotten in the hall way.

"Go ahead!" Mallory screamed after them. "Run like the little bitch you are! Take your crap with you!" She threw the suitcase out of the door and it skidded to a halt in front of the car. "If I ever catch you, you little crack whore, or your pussy boyfriend on my property again I swear I will take out my rifle and shoot you until you are dead! Dead, you hear me! DEAD!" Mallory kept on screaming out of the house even after the car had pulled away.

"Lena," Jonathan said. "I am so sorry."

"Oh, Jonathan!" she sobbed.

"Don't worry, we are almost home. Then you never have to face Mallory again." But how wrong he was, he wouldn't know until it was too late.

* * *

Hello all of my loving fans! I know that I haven't posted in forever! But I have some good news! If any of you remember my reason for not posting, it was because of my very first speech and debate meet. Well, I won first place for my dramatics! I am so happy! So, I wanted to thank all of you for being so patient with me! And to show my gratitude to you all you all get an extra special 5 course e-dinner of your choice! Now, time for the shout outs!

Silver Anarchist- You have no idea how she will react to Jonathan's job! That is the major part of the story, but not to worry, we have a lot more chapters to go through before we get to that particular point. Oh, and I bid you happy watching your Batman movie!

b- Thank you! I hope this chapter will be up to your amazement level!

Blodeuedd- Dude! (Jumps in and dances equally lame dance moves with Blodeuedd) And don't worry about the Scarecrow/Crane dialogue. There will be much more to come, but not in the next few chapters.

Spinnincircles- Oh my. That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. I am so flattered! (Jumps up and hugs spinnincircles) You are so nice! You need to hurry and post your stories so I can return the favor! I just can't say how happy that made me! That totally made my day! 8-)

Jessica- I have actually never heard of the Irish folk band you are talking about, but if you give me their name I'll see if I can't find some of their music. The sound like a really cool band. No, my choir sung that song for the last choir concert. My choir butchered it, though. And you will see a little more insight to Lena's family, just not for a little while. I have everything planed in my head, but if I can get it out on paper within a week of thinking of it, that is a different story. ;-)

Firefly 4000- (shoves snickers in mouth and hardly even chews then proceeds to talk with mouthful) Johnny will get his action in due time, I just don't want to rush that because it is such a crucial part of his and Lena's relationship.

Thank you all so very much for being so patient and forgiving! But, to let you know ahead of time, my next speech and debate meet is the 15th and 16th of December, so I will try to get as many chapters in as I can from now until then.

Love,

Celia


	10. Cleaning liquids and shopping lists

For the next month, Lena stayed with Jonathan and the voice persisted with the same comments. Finally one day, it just went away. Jonathan thought that it might come back after a few days, but it didn't. He waited a week and it didn't make a sound. Jonathan was finally free of the annoying voice. He was free to do what he pleased without its comments. He was free to take his and Lena's relationship to the next level.

The month changed from August to September and classes at GCU were going to start in almost a week's time.

It was Lena's turn to cook and she had dragged Jonathan to the grocery store. "Lena, you know I hate shopping."

"Oh calm down you big weenie," Lena said as she reached for the shredded cheese. "One hour of shopping for food won't kill you. And besides, I am the one cooking, what are you complaining about?"

"Lena, I have seen you cook."

"Hey!" she exclaimed as she poked him with the sausage link. "That was one time! And the directions on that box were wrong! It said to cook them at 500 degrees for an hour!"

"No, it said cook them for six minutes, not sixty."

"Well, that was only once. And anyway, how hard is it to make pizza?"

"I am so sorry, Jonathan. I didn't know that pizzas were that highly flammable," said Lena as she got into his car.

"It's okay; we put out the fire before it got to bad."

"I burnt it to a crisp!"

"It's okay. This will give us a nice chance to go out." _And a chance to talk to her about us._ he thought. "We hardly ever eat out. Now, where do you want to go?"

"I don't know, Olive Garden?"

"Sounds good to me."

As they pulled up to the parking lot Jonathan turned to Lena and took a breath. "Lena, we need to talk."

She tucked her newly dyed black hair behind her ears and said, "Okay, shoot." She had a bit of worry tucked away in her voice and hoped that Jonathan didn't notice.

"I care more about you then anyone else in the world."

"As I do you."

"And I was hoping that we could take our relation to the next level."

"What do you mean, 'next level'?" she asked warily.

Jonathan hadn't expected this. "Uh..."

"I hope you don't think that I am going to sleep with you, because I love you, but I am not ready to take that step."

"No, no. Not at all. I mean..."

"Like holding hands and giving each other nicknames?"

"Yes." He was relived that she had done the explaining for him.

"I would love that snookums!"

"No snookums."

"Oh come on! It is so cute!"

"No, I draw the line at snookums."

"Fine, how about... honey?"

"That I can deal with." They were all smiles as they walked into the restaurant.

About a week after classes start Lena and Jonathan were home on a break when the mail man pulled up to Jonathan's mail box. "I'll get the mail," Lena yelled from across the house. Jonathan was in the kitchen getting something to eat.

"Anything for me?" he asked as she walked into the kitchen with a stack of papers in her hands.

"A few bills and a letter inviting you to chaperone the Halloween dance at the end of October. That sounds fun, maybe we could go together."

"I thought we discussed this. If the school board finds out about this you would lose any chance of any scholarships you want and I would get fired."

"I know." She kept riffling through the mail until she came across a piece of mail addressed to her. "Look at this," she shoved an open letter under Jonathan's nose.

"What is it?"

"It's a letter from child services saying that Mallory demands I come back and live with her."

"How is that possible?"

"I have no idea." The next day they went to the main office for child services and waited in the office of one of the child services people.

"What is the meaning of this letter?" Jonathan asked the woman as he threw the paper on her desk. Lena took Jonathan's hand, expecting the worst.

"It means that by law, Lena isn't able to live anywhere but her guardian's house. If you don't go back within the next few days, Mallory can file a missing persons report and then that is just a big legal mess."

"But Mallory kicked me out of her house! She said if Jonathan or I ever stepped on her property again, she would shoot us with her gun, which I am almost sure that she doesn't have a license for!"

"I know, but if you really are trying to sue her son for rape and you win, you would be placed in an orphanage because they would deem her house a non-safe place to live. You wouldn't be able to go and do as you please. It is just better if you stay with them until you turn 18, Lena. And as for the gun thing, honey, half the people in this town don't have a license for their guns, but the police have more important things to worry about."

On the way back to Jonathan's house, Lena was silent. As she packed she was silent. Finally, as he was parking in front of Mallory's house Jonathan said, "Lena," but she cut him off by throwing her arms around him.

"Jonathan!" she sobbed. "I don't want to live with them, they will kill me! They'll drive me to suicide again! And nothing will stop me this time!"

This drove a knife of fear through Jonathan's heart. Something he hadn't felt in a long time. The gut wrenching feeling of the possibility of losing someone you love. "Lena, don't you dare. I will never forgive you if you do." He hugged her tighter and said, "I don't think I could live without you. If you aren't going to stop your self for anything else, stop yourself for me, please Lena. I think I would die if I lost you."

"You really mean that?"

"Of course! Call me if the thought even enters your mind, I will have my cell phone with me and on at all times."

"I love you Jonathan."

Jonathan wasn't expecting that. He froze and a pit dropped in his stomach. He got shivers up his spine and the words that came out of his mouth sounded and felt alien to him. He had never had to say he loved anything before. "I love you to." She gave him a quick kiss and got out of the car. He watched as she walked to what seemed to be her impending doom.

Jonathan went back home and thought about Lena. He really did love her, why was it so hard to say it?

_It's because your original intentions were to hurt her!_ said the voice. _You never meant for this to go so far, you were going to use her as a guinea pig for your experiments!_

"I do love Lena!" The voice subsided into a simmer and Jonathan got prepared for his next class.

As soon as Lena walked in the door, Mallory started to bitch about her. "Where the hell have you been? You have so many chores to finish!"

At the end of that day, Lena was in tears. She speed dialed Jonathan's number and the first thing out of his mouth was, "Are you alright?"

"No. I hate them all! They are the family from hell!" she sobbed.

"Can you sneak out and come to see me?"

"I'll try; bring your car to the park. That is the nearest to the house we can get."

Jonathan was at the park in a flash and saw a huddled figure on the park bench.

"Lena," he said as she climbed in the car. Her face was tired and tearstained, her clothes smelled of cleaning liquids and deep frying oil. "You look terrible."

She did nothing but throw herself on him and sob. They didn't even talk. Just Jonathan's presence made her feel safer then she had ever been. With Jonathan, she was home.

The next month went on like that, Lena being over worked and abused at home. The only time she would ever see Jonathan was at school. So, every night, she would sneak out of the house and spend most of the night in Jonathan's car or he would take her to his house so she could get some undisturbed rest.

But sooner then not, it was Jonathan who needed the undisturbed rest. The head psychiatrist at Arkham was running Jonathan ragged.

"Crane," said Doctor Smith. "I am going to need you to do a few things for me."

_It's going to be something stupid, like get him coffee, or get him food like it has been for the past month and a half. _"Like what?" Jonathan asked through clenched teeth. He was afraid that if he opened his mouth anymore, the adjectives for Dr. Smith would come spilling out, for example, one that starts with an F and ends with a U and one with all the profanity cut out would go something like this, You mother – little – stupid piece of – brainless – dumb- -.

"Well, I have a list for you right here." He handed Jonathan a piece of paper and Jonathan read it through.

"Wal-Mart, the laundry mat, the book store, the cigar shop? Pardon me for asking, _sir_, but what does any of this have to do with my internship here at Arkham? This is gofer work. Shouldn't I be helping you with some of the patients?"

"Just do the assignment, Crane." Smith started to walk away.

"But I really think that my talent would be better served treating the patients. And it is an hour before closing, I need to get home. This is going to take all night."

"So? It's not like you have someone waiting at home for you." Jonathan bit his tongue so he would not tell Smith about Lena. "Just go do the assignment."

"But Dr. Smith,"

"One more crack out of you, Crane, and you can kiss this internship goodbye."

They were the only ones left in the hallway. Jonathan felt his anger bubbling up like steam and water On the very top was the voice, coxing in his ear, _"Use your anger, Jonathan. He is stupid! How he ever got to become the head of **your** Arkham, we will never know. But there is no one else around. Why don't you tell him just exactly what you think of him? _

_No, _thought Jonathan. _I will lose the internship for good! _

_Then let **me** tell him! _And suddenly, Jonathan lost control of his body, mind, and mouth. It was almost as if he was watching the movie of his life through his eyes, but not being able to intervene.

"Hey, Smith!" yelled the voice. It was using Jonathan's body to talk to Smith. Jonathan tried to shut his mouth, but the voice had complete control over him. There was nothing else Jonathan could do, but sit back (metaphorically speaking) and watch his life come crashing down around him.

"I thought I told you to get a start on that list?"

"You did. But, honestly, when I have I ever listened to a word you said? Let me think," the voice put Jonathan's hand to Jonathan's face in a thinking pose. "Never!"

"Excuse me?"

"No, there is no excuse for you! How you ever got to be the head of this prestigious asylum, I will never know."

"Why?"

"Because you are so goddamn stupid! For someone with a Harvard degree you are the dumbest ass on the face of the earth! Jesus, don't you use your eyes! Your wife is having an affair with the janitor and you are the last to know!"

"You are out of line, Crane!"

"Your daughter has been having sex since she moved in with her boyfriend and you are the last to know!"

"Do NOT talk about my family!"

"Your son has been doing pot since he was 12 and you are the last to know!"

"This is all lies! I don't believe any of this!"

"And me. You think I look up to you and admire you for being head of Arkham. Wrong! I think you are the scum of this earth and you don't deserve this job in the least and, once again, you are the last to know."

"That's it! You're fired!" And Smith walked away.

When Jonathan finally regained control of his mind, his first thought was _Oh, shit. How am I going to get my job back? _He looked at his watch. _It's only a little less then an hour before closing time. Maybe if I wait in his office and plead momentary insanity, he will reconsider. _

_If all else fails, _said the voice. _You could kill him and step up to your rightful place as head of Arkham._

_Well,_ Jonathan thought. _Let's hope it doesn't come to that. _

Hello all! Happy holidays! I know I haven't posted in a while, but I have been really side tracked with the holiday season! That is, by far, my most favorite time of the year! Right before Thanksgiving and through Christmas is just full of such good cheer and good feelings… I am starting to sound like a Christmas carol, aren't I? Oh well! e-Thanksgiving food for everyone! Shout outs!

Silver Anarchist- Thanks! And totally understandable about 'mommy dearest' wanting the computer. My family of five has only one computer and we are constantly fighting over it!

Blodeuedd- Thanks! I think we all are a bit brain dead after stuffing ourselves with yummy food, so no hard feelings!

Firefly4000- Thank you! Let's see, pointers on Crane. Uhh… well, try your hardest not to bend his character to much to fit your story. Keep him at least semi evil. Like with mine, he will get much more evil in later chapters. And don't turn him into fluff! Because the first draft of my story was so much fluff, my beta reader was appalled! She made me rewrite the entire thing! Maybe one or two sentences stayed the same. And don't worry, Jonathan and Lena will uhh… share some intimate moments soon. All in due time.

Kate Beckert- Thank you so much! That is one of the nicest reviews I have gotten in a while! It's always good to see that new people are enjoying this as much as the original readers! I love Crane to! But allot of my friends say that he looks like a girl and I just want to smack them upside the head and say, 'Shut up! You're just jealous of his good looks!' I will most definitely check out your Crane fic! Post it soon! And I would love to email you to tell you when the chapters are up, but my email won't let me email anyone outside of the website, sorry!

And to all of you who didn't review and those who have, thank you so very much for sticking with me! We made it to the tenth chapter! Can you believe it! I am very excited! I will try to get the next one posted soon!

Love,

Celia


	11. The straw that broke his back

Jonathan grabbed his suitcase and, with the toxin and mask secure, he headed to Smith's office to see if he could salvage any of his remaining dignity.

He got to the office and, with a stroke of good fortune, he found it unlocked. As he shut the door behind him, he felt his fingers tug at the latch of the suitcase. _Stop that!_ he told the voice. _You lost me the internship in the first place! I don't want anymore trouble from you! _

_Oh, but it would be so much fun to gas him! Come on, please! _

_NO! _And the voice died down a bit. Jonathan heard the doorknob turn and saw Smith standing in the doorway.

"Dr. Smith…" Jonathan began.

"I thought I fired you?" he spit the rhetorical question rather then asking.

"You did, but…" he felt his fingers tug at the latch again. _I thought I told you to stop that! _he told the voice.

_That wasn't me Jonathan, _the voice said. _I was going to back off and let you do all the talking this time. _

_Well, then why…_ Jonathan felt a growing sensation in the pit of his stomach and tried his hardest to ignore the sudden feeling of why he was there.

"There is nothing you can say to get your job back here Crane. If I have my way you will never work in this town again."

"But you see, sir…"

"The only thing I see is a scrawny boy who thinks he can do or say whatever he wants. You know Crane, I knew that you were a mistake from the first day. Remember? I had caught you in a cell with one of the patients. You had just pulled a syringe out of his arm and he wasn't scheduled for another dose of his medication until three ours later."

"I was giving him a sedative, and you are out of line by calling me scrawny."

"You were out of line when you told me all those lies about my family! So, why don't I return the favor and let me tell you what I honestly think of you?"

"I don't think that is necessary…"

"I think you are far too confident in your abilities as a psychiatrist," Jonathan felt his hands tug at the latch again.

"I know the reason you have never been on a date in your life, you are far to creepy! There is not one female in this entire building who would ever date you." Jonathan had to grip the handle of the brief case as tight as he could to restrain himself from opening it and putting on the mask.

"There is a reason they called you Scarecrow when you were little."

Jonathan became outraged and screamed, "Don't you DARE drag that into this conversation!"

"You are tall, gangly, creepy, and have the emotional range of a Scarecrow! In fact you are no better then them! You would do yourself and others a lot of good if you just hung yourself in a field with all of your brothers and sisters! Go on back to your 'family hole'. No one would miss you. Not even your little bitch, Lena."

That was the straw that broke Jonathan's back. Smith could have gone all night insulting Jonathan; Smith probably would have walked out with a few bruises, but with a perfectly sane mind. But as soon as those last few words left Smith's mouth, Jonathan had one motive and one only; to instill the greatest fear of all, and then, kill.

Almost as if on cue, the lights went out. Jonathan let out a quite, devilish laugh when he heard Smith back up against the wall. "I can feel your fear, Smith."

"What the hell are you doing!" screamed Smith as Jonathan navigated his way, oh so carefully and quietly, across the room to the desk.

"Would you like to see my mask?" Jonathan asked, ever so quietly, while opening his brief case and slipping the mask on.

"Where the fuck are you Crane!" Smith tried to sound like he wasn't afraid, but the fear in the room was so thick, Jonathan could almost taste it.

"Well, I guess you won't be able to see it. It is dark, after all." Jonathan slowly made his way up to where Smith was. Jonathan had always had an innate ability to see very well in the dark.

"What the fuck is going on!"

"You called me a Scarecrow, did you not?" Jonathan asked even slower, building up the suspense of Smith's inevitable doom.

"What?"

"Just answer the question Smith." Jonathan's voice took on a low, murderous tone.

"Y-yes," Smith stammered out.

"Then do you think that Scarecrows aren't… scary?" Jonathan was whispering at this point. He felt giddy inside, but remained his cool, calm demeanor on the outside.

"What does that…"

"Answer the question," he said sharply, yet still whispering.

Smith stood there, squirming in his fear, trying to think of what the best answer would be. "N-no. I-I don't."

"Really?" Jonathan was so close to Smith now, he was whispering in his ear. "You don't sound to brave at the moment."

"I-I don't think that Scarecrows are s-scary."

"Well," Jonathan smiled. "Let us see just how scary you think this one is."

* * *

I cannot thank you all enough for putting up with my inability to get off of my ass and post! But lately my grades haven't been ideal, so school must take precedence over my stories. I am on break right now, so I will try to get in as many chapters as I can, seeing as I only have a week and a half for break. But I promise I will try my hardest. And for those of you who read my Red Eye story, I will put posting on that story at the top of my list. e-Christmas cookies and e-eggnog for everyone who read and reviewed on my last chapter and the same to those of you who read and review this one.

Love and happy holidays,

Celia


	12. Nightmares and Angel Dust

The next thing Jonathan knew, he was standing over a very dead Smith. He remembered every wonderful detail. Smith's screams and his plead for mercy. The beautiful sound of the toxin being shot into the air. Jonathan didn't think that he would ever be able to go back to the normal way of living after he felt what this was like! And best of all, now that Smith is dead, Jonathan could take his rightful place as head of Arkham!

Jonathan pushed his hair away from his eyes and looked at his watch. The illuminating face said two o'clock in the morning. _I will just go home and tell _ _Lena__ that Smith made me do some stupid errands for him, she won't suspect a thing. But Do I want to keep secrets from her? That has never exactly helped a relationship before… or so I've been told. _Jonathan thought.

_But Johnny, _said the voice._ Do you really want her to know that you killed someone? Even if they were causing you serious pain? _

_Well, you know that keeping secrets is going to do nothing but hurt our relation ship._

_Oh no!_ said the voice. _I am not going to let your conscience get in the way of one of the only good things that has ever happened to me! _And all of the sudden, all thoughts of Jonathan telling Lena were evaporated from his mind.

At two thirty Jonathan rolled into bed next to Lena. Her eyes popped open and she asked, "Where have you been Jonathan? I was starting to worry about you."

"I had to do some errands for Smith," he lied easily.

"Oh, okay. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." And within a minute, Jonathan was fast asleep; still filled with the power that had reverberated through his body when he had taken the life of Smith.

Jonathan had a dream that night that was all too real. Lena had run away for some reason and Jonathan couldn't find her. He ran through the streets of Gotham calling her name. Then, his heart dropped as he turned a corner and there she was, lying on the cold, dirty ground dieing. From what, Jonathan couldn't tell, but in his heart, he knew she was slipping away. His tears started to fall onto the almost lifeless body of Lena; she smiled at him one last time and whispered "I love you, Jonathan Crane. And I always will." Then, her body went limp in his arms. He sobbed and screamed for her to come back, but there was no reply. His heart was broken. No; he no longer had a heart. That had died along with Lena.

"Come back to me Lena! Don't leave me here all alone!"

"Jonathan!" Jonathan opened his eyes and awoke from the terrible nightmare. His vision was distorted by tears, but he saw her. Alive and sitting next to him with her head cocked at an angle. Without a moment's hesitation Jonathan sat up and wrapped his arms around her, laying her head on his chest and stroking her hair. "Jonathan, what is the matter?" she asked in her soft, caring voice.

"Don't ever leave me Lena, please. I would die if I lost you," he mumbled something that was barely audible and continued to have silent tears drip into her long black hair.

When Jonathan had dropped Lena off back at her house (Mallory still wanted Lena to stay in the house at all times but Jonathan had been sneaking her to his house for the night) he got to Arkham and there was 'DO NOT CROSS' police tape everywhere.

_So, _said the voice. _I want you to start calling me by my real name._

_Which is?_ asked Jonathan.

_Scarecrow._

_Why? _

_Because it is annoying the way you refer to me as 'voice' all the time. And I have always been Scarecrow, you have just never wanted to admit it. _

But before Jonathan could retaliate, the familiar face of the most popular sergeant in Gotham met him at the asylum door. Jonathan put on a look of annoyance and innocence when Gordon stepped in front of the door.

"Excuse me, I need to get to my job," Jonathan said when Gordon wouldn't let him past.

"In case you didn't hear your boss was murdered last night and no one knows who did it."

Jonathan smiled with pride internally and said, "Well, that is a bit unnerving, but I have patients to take care off and some of them need their medicine now."

Gordon shook his head and said, "You've got a lot courage; wanting to go in there right after your boss was killed."

"I am just dedicated to my job. Now, I really need to get in there and give my patients their medicine."

"You can't go in there alone, we aren't finished sweeping the building for the killer yet."

"Then I suggest you find someone to come with me then. I have no problem going in there alone, but those patients need to be taken care of," Jonathan retorted with the most defiant and determined voice he could muster.

Gordon thought about it for a while and reluctantly said, "Damn it Crane. I'll I go in with you." They slipped under the tape and into the asylum.

Gordon walked through the halls with his gun in firing position and Jonathan walked with ease and no worry. Gordon would throw his hand out to push Jonathan against the wall to look around the corner and Jonathan just sighed, but kept the act up. He didn't want to look suspicious. Jonathan went around the halls, administering the medicine and food to the patients that needed it. The whole process took about three hours, but halfway through Jonathan's cell phone rang.

"Crane," Jonathan said into the receiver.

"Jonathan? Why do you sound so angry on the phone?"

" Lena?"

"Yeah, it's me. You always seem angry on the phone. Did you know that your boss died last night?"

"Yes, I am in the asylum right now…"

"What?" she cut him off. "The reporter said that they haven't finished sweeping the place for the killer! Jonathan get your ass out of there right now! If you die because of your own reckless mistake of not listening to the police…"

" Lena don't worry about me, I am going to be fine. The patients need their medicine now or they will be wrecked for the week. I am hanging up now."

"Don't you dare!"

"I love you."

"Wait! If you hang up on me I will…"

Jonathan didn't hear what she was going to do with him, for he had hung up on her and he knew that what ever she was going to do to him was an empty threat. All he had to do was flash his blue eyes at her and all was forgiven.

"Are you done yet?" Gordon asked impatiently.

Jonathan gave him a piercing stare and said, "This is my job. This is what I get paid to do. Today is a longer day then usual because Smith was to busy getting killed to give the patients their medicine. Some of our higher security patients have gone hours with out the medicine that makes the killers docile." Someone screamed and Gordon jumped. "And that's my cue."

"For what?" Gordon asked shakily.

"That scream came from one of the high security rooms. The only patient in the high security rooms that screams is Louis Thompson." Jonathan set of on a speed walk to his office. "He was a mass murder who we all just thought was like any other murder, but it turns out he was a phencyclidine user,"

"A what user?"

"PCP," Jonathan answered, but when he got another blank stare from Gordon he said, "Angel dust?" Gordon nodded and Jonathan went on, "And when he had hallucinations, he saw that everything around him was a monster that he had to kill. He was the man on the killing spree of 95. They couldn't send him to jail," Jonathan was in his office now, rummaging through his cabinets for the special medicine for Thompson. "Because he was so adapt at killing that he would have killed everyone in sight. So they sent him here." Jonathan found a syringe and the bottle of medicine and started to fill the canister of the needle.

"So do you normally administer his medicine? Because he sounds like he would snap you in two."

"We have him in a full body straight jacket but every once in a while he'll chew through the restraints or somehow get out of his jacket and we have to take him down with a tranquilizer gun."

Gordon gulped audibly as Jonathan finished his sentence and walked out of the room. They took the elevator and when the screams just grew louder and were soon accompanied by loud crashes. Jonathan sighed and said, "He's loose. Damn, and I didn't bring that tranquilizer gun."

Gordon whipped his head around and said, "What are you going to do? You can't take him down by yourself."

"I will try to reason with him long enough to give him his dosage." And as the elevator doors opened, the two way mirror showed a very built man doing some very, what looked like, well practiced fighting moves on his straight jacket.

"He used to be an assassin before he started with the PCP. Apparently he was the best in the business. He was trained in Judo, Karate, and Jujitsu." Jonathan paused for a moment and then sighed, as if this was just another day's work. "I guess I'll go in now."

"You have got to be kidding yourself," Gordon said. "Either that or you have a death wish! He is going to kill you if you go in there."

"Do you see that long fracture along the glass?" Jonathan pointed out a two foot long crack with one of his long, slender fingers. "He did that with his fist and that is triple plated unbreakable glass. If I don't go in there now he will be out in less than three minutes and he will attack you. Wish me luck," and Jonathan calmly punched in the code and walked into the room with the raging bull.

Jonathan's ears were assaulted with a scream of rage from Thompson. Although he had kept a cool demeanor with Gordon, Jonathan was terrified. So, he turned to the only other person in the room for help.

_You rang?_ said Scarecrow.

* * *

I know you all hate me for not posting in such a long time. But my computer has been crashing since Christmas, so I had to revert to the pen and paper. Then when I finished that I had to try to read my handwriting so I could get it on tomy jumpdrive. But I have been so busy with speech and debate, school, and the play (I got a part in the school play) I hardly have any time to sleep let alone deal with my stupid computer. So please don't hate me if I don't get the next chapter up right away. Please bear with me in these terrible times of not having enough time for anything. So to all of you who have stuck by me and not abandoned me you all get a life size e-Jonathan Crane! Complete with split personality disorder! I would love to chat, but the computer at the library is flashing a sign in front of me that says I have exceeded the one hour limit. Oh well.

Love,

Celia


	13. Straight jackets and KO’s

Jonathan's ears were assaulted with a scream of rage from Thompson. Although he had kept a cool demeanor with Gordon, Jonathan was terrified. So, he turned to the only other person in the room for help.

_You rang?_ said Scarecrow.

_I need your help! I don't know what to do. I can't take him on by myself and I didn't bring the tranquilizer gun with me! You have to help me!_

_Don't you worry about a thing, Johnny boy. You just sit back and watch the show._ And just like the previous night, Jonathan had a feeling come over him and he lost all control of his mind and body. But something was different this time, Jonathan couldn't see through his eyes. He couldn't hear what Scarecrow was doing.

_Scarecrow! What's happening! _It was as if Jonathan was in a soundproof room that didn't have a light. He was in the dark and Scarecrow wasn't answering. Jonathan tried calling for him again, but it was no use. So Jonathan waited and waited. It seemed like an eternity, but in reality it was only five minutes.

When Scarecrow finally said, _All done. _Jonathan regained control of his mind and body. As his vision slid back into view, Jonathan's first sight was Gordon with his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open. "I am impressed Crane. I didn't expect you to knock him out within the first two minutes."

"Well, thank you. But I really must be getting on with the other patients." Jonathan was freaking out internally. He had, apparently, just taken down the toughest inmate in less then two minutes, the rest of the three he was guessing he had put Thompson in the straight jacket and given him his medicine, and he didn't remember a thing.

Just as Jonathan had taken a step forward, he heard Gordon's walkie talkie, "Gordon, the entire place has been searched twice and no sign of the killer."

"Are you sure?" Gordon asked.

"Absolutely."

"Fine," Gordon sighed.

"Well, I guess you don't have to follow me anymore," Jonathan said.

"Okay then. But be careful; the sensors that we used don't always detect everything."

"No need to tell me twice," said Jonathan, with just a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

_Scarecrow! _Jonathan screamed (internally) as soon as Gordon was out of sight.

_No need to shout, Johnny boy. What can I do for you?_

_I want to know what the hell happened back there! _

_What do you mean?_

_I couldn't see or hear or feel anything! It was almost as if you had taken over my body completely._

_I did._

_What! _Jonathan screamed.

_I did. I figured that it would have been too much of a traumatic experience so I took control._

_Don't ever do that again! I need to be in control of my body at all times! Do you understand me!_

_Of course. _And with that closing note, Scarecrow slipped away to the hiding place in the back of Jonathan's mind.

* * *

Hello my little ducklings! You have my profound apology for not posting in months. Although I have excuses, none of them are good enough to excuse me not posting in so long (with the exception of perhaps that my mother broke three of her ribs and I had to take care of her and my sister (who just got sick recently and isn't getting any better) and the fact that the computer had been boxed up for a long time) so you have, not only my deepest apology, but a promise that the next chapter will be up soon. When I cannot say at the moment, because I have a story in the works, and so far, it sounds awesome, so that may take up some of my free time. But, what I can tell you is that I have a good ten pages of work already done on Love of Fear, they just need some reworking because, I wrote them at least a year ago. You see, when I came up with the idea for Love of Fear, I got board with the beginning and started writing the middle. So, when I wrote the next few chapters, it was a while ago and some things happened in the chapters I have posted weren't planed in the things I haven't posted. So I have to go back and rework the things I haven't posted to fit with the things I have.

Love,

Celia


	14. The verdict and a drunken rage

They took Joe to court and he was put on trial. The trial only lasted a few weeks.  
Although it seemed to drag on forever, the last day hit Jonathan and Lena unexpectedly. It was October the ninth; a Sunday.

"Has the jury reached a verdict?" asked the judge. Lena held her breath and squeezed Jonathan's hand. She had been waiting for this moment for so very long. Her lawyer's information was undeniable and the arguments he presented were perfect. There was no way any one of the jury could possible plead Joe not guilty. But in times like this, Lena had a tendency to become a pessimist.

There were only eight people in the jury, and the speaker rose. "The jury has reached a verdict, your honor. First juror pleads," Lena held her breath. "Guilty on account of multiple rape." As soon as the rest of the jury gave their say in the matter, guilty on all accounts of rape and domestic violence, Lena put her head on Jonathan's chest and started to cry.

"It's okay, Lena. You are safe now. Joe got 24 years of prison. He can't hurt you anymore," Jonathan said as he wrapped his arms around her.

"I'm crying because I am relieved!" she said in between sobs. "He got every thing he deserved."

"He should have gotten the death penalty," Jonathan said, his anger boiling up inside. "They should have killed him right now after what he had done to you."

Lena wiped her eyes and said, "Forget about him. Like you said, he can't hurt us anymore."

As they walked to Jonathan's car Lena said, "Did you know that tomorrow is my birthday?"

"Yes I did," Jonathan lied. _Shit I forgot! _

"What did you get me?"

"I'm not telling you."

"Please?"

"No."

They laughed and went to Jonathan's house to relax and just to be in each other's arms.

When it came time for Lena to leave, neither of them wanted her to go, but she had to. So, Jonathan dropped her off and went back to his lonely, empty house.

It started to storm.

When Jonathan got home, all he could think about was Lena. He tried to get his mind off her in anyway possible, but nothing seemed to work; he couldn't even work on his toxins he was so distracted.

"Maybe if I take a cold shower…" he thought out loud. He went into his bathroom and got the shower running. He had taken his jacket off and was halfway done unbuttoning his shirt when he heard a knock at the door. _Who in hell could that be?_ He grabbed his glasses, turned the water off, and headed for the door.

"What are you…" he didn't get to finish his sentence because a very soggy Lena threw herself on him and sobbed into his shoulder.

"I hate them! I want them to die! All of them need to die and burn in hell!" Jonathan wrapped his arms around the distraught girl and said,

"What happened Lena? Who needs to die?" He held the girl at arms length. He saw clearly; she had bruises and cuts all over her face and, when he took her jacket off, all over her body. "They beat you didn't they?" he asked horrified that anyone would want to hurt an innocent girl like Lena. _But that was your original intention, wasn't it. To hurt her, to make her suffer. _said Scarecrow. Jonathan brushed him away. _I don't anymore though. I love her, I care about her. _But the better half of his real conscience told him, _But you love fear more. _

She just nodded and threw herself on his shoulder again. Jonathan led her to the couch and went to get some towels for her to dry off with. After a while she calmed down and he asked her, "What happened? Why did they beat you?" she was sitting in his lap on the couch and he was rocking her back and forth.

"I went home and I hadn't even stepped all the way in when I heard, 'WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN!' from Mallory. She was drunk again, but normally when she gets drunk she is really passive, but something was different this time."

"'I've been with Jonathan, why?' I asked."

"'We've been waiting for you all day! The floors and walls aren't going to clean themselves you whore!' she said, screaming at me"

"'Well,' I said. 'If you are so worried about the way your house looks, then get off your fat ass and do it yourself!' That was a big mistake. She slapped me first and then it escaladed. Bob came to, just as drunk as Mallory. He held me down while Mallory beat me. I tried to fight back but Bob was stronger then I had given him credit for. Mallory's foot was aiming for my head, but I moved and she kicked the pillow instead. They must have thought that the pillow was me because Mallory started to beat the pillow while Bob held it down. I crept out of the back door and ran all the way here because they had the keys to my car." She went back to weeping on Jonathan's shoulder.

He sat with her for as long as she needed. She had finally calmed down to where instead of sobbing, she was just sitting in Jonathan's lap, trying her hardest to relax.

"Why don't you spend the night here?" Jonathan asked Lena. "I don't think you should go home after that."

"No! I never want to go home, never," she said.

"Well why don't you try to get some sleep after I clean these cuts and bruises?" He walked her into the kitchen, picked her up, and put her on the counter.

He grabbed a dish towel and ran it under the warm water from the sink. He put his hand on Lena's face so he could clean the cut on her cheek. She shuddered under his soft touch and grimaced. "Sorry, does that hurt?" he asked.

She nodded slightly. "Okay I will try to be gentler," he said in a gentle tone.

"It's not that you aren't being gentle, it's just, the bruises are so," she looked in Jonathan's eyes and didn't finish the sentence. They sat there looking into each other, lost in a mix of wanting to make love right then and there, and knowing that it was a bad idea.

Minutes passed and Jonathan finally broke the gaze and put the, now, cold towel under the hot water again, and finished cleaning that particular cut.

"There, all done with your face, now let's see your body," he said. Lena blushed and took off her shirt to reveal a white bra, but that was the only thing white about her; she was cover in black and purple bruises and red cuts. But one stood out in front of all the rest. It was a deep bloody cut that spanned the length of her back. "Jesus." Jonathan took his finger and ran it lightly along the open wound. Lena sucked in air through a clenched jaw. "Lena, they couldn't have cut you this bad by just hitting you. Did they pull a knife on you?"

She took in a shuddering breath and with tears spilling out of her eyes again, she said, "Yes. I didn't think you would help me, so I didn't tell you." Her shoulders started to shake with sobs again and Jonathan turned her around and wrapped his arms around her.

"Shh, it's okay. I'm here and I'll help you. But I really need to clean these cuts and check if they are infected, okay?" he said in a soft, caring voice. She collected herself and turned around, still sitting on the counter.

Jonathan could almost hear her trying not to cry out in pain, and she was doing well, but when he started to clean the cut that crossed the width of her back she let out a small yelp and gripped the counter top so hard, her knuckles went white. He put his hand over hers and she didn't relax immediately, but he whispered in her ear, "Take my hand and every time you feel pain, squeeze my hand and try to transfer it into me, let me take the pain for you." Her beautiful hand slowly relaxed and grasped his pale one. He continued to clean and she grasped his hand, tighter with every stroke of the wet towel on her back.

"Finished. Do you have any cuts on your legs or front?" he asked, his hand painfully entwined with Lena's.

She took her pants off so he could make sure that the cuts on her legs weren't infected and could clean all the rest.

"All done," he said as he helped her off the counter. "Why did you think that I wasn't going to help you?"

She refused to look at him. "No one has ever helped me before. I have had to fend for myself since before I can remember. My parents died when I was four, and I didn't even go to an orphanage. I went straight to the asshole of a family."

Jonathan thought,_ I think I have found my next test subjects. _

Jonathan took her face in his soft pale hands forcing her to look into his ice blue eyes. "I will always help you no matter what happens. I swear till my dieing day, I will always help you."

Tears rolled down her cheeks and into the cuts on her face. She put her hands on his. "You swear? You swear to me on my life?"

"I swear to you on both our lives, I will _always_ help you, _always._" They looked into each others eyes and put his hand on the small of her back, as close to her bottom as he could get, pulled her in close, and kissed her.

* * *

Hello once again my little ducklings! Today is a momentous day! I have, for once, updated in a timely fashion! WOOHOO! WOOT WOOT! e- fudge for everyone who read and reviewed! Thanks for sticking with me guys! I love you all! Oh, and if you want, I'll give you a preview for the next chapter! This one's gonna be good!

Jonathan stepped out of the shower stall and he hadn't even had his glasses on for two seconds when Lena jumped on him and kissed him roughly knocking him into the wall behind them.

She had her body pressed up against his so hard Jonathan could feel every one of his cells tingling with anticipation and pleasure.

"Couldn't sleep?" he asked, breaking the kiss.

"I was to busy thinking about you," and she went to kiss him again, but Jonathan put his hand in front of her mouth to stop her.

" Lena, I'm gay."

Teehee! Just kidding about that "I'm gay" part, but the rest is what you have to look forward to!

Love,

Celia


End file.
